Tom Brady Blitzes Woke Nike: Refuses $1 Billion Deal, Says ‘No Thanks’ to Wokeness

In a shocking turn of events, NFL legend Tom Brady has reportedly turned down a jaw-dropping $1 billion handshake deal with sportswear giant ‘Woke’ Nike.

The reason? Brady boldly declared, “I don’t work with woke companies.” While many were left scratching their heads at the quarterback’s decision, Brady explained that he prefers his sneakers without a side of social justice.

Speculation abounds as to what brands might be next in line to court the six-time Super Bowl champion, with rumors swirling that ‘Stay-Asleep’ Under Armour might be a more suitable fit. One thing’s for sure: in the game of endorsements, it’s not just about touchdowns—it’s about taking a stand.